Hello friends!
It’s been a little over a month since the last time I’ve posed and that’s because my job has slowly been sucking out my soul–but the good news is it won’t be for long!
I recently got promoted and am just transitioning between stores and training a bunch of new talent. If you’re also in retail management you can probably relate to the holiday madness and feel my pain. It’s like running a race under water, you can never really get anywhere. Every time I feel confident about where my store is at I’m slammed with 50 hours of shipment to process, three associates calling out and our power going out (this means I can just go home right?).
Needless to say, I haven’t had as much time for the things I love (like blogging, photography, and wine) as I’d like to. But I recently decided to make some decisions that would actually support my happiness and make me feel a little bit more in control of my own life.
The first was to find a new job. Which seems like something obvious. If you don’t like where you are, then change it. But it really isn’t that simple when you’re working on your days off and are clocked in for 14 hours. I had zero time for job hunting. But, I decided to submit my resume to Sephora online on one of my few and precious days off. A few weeks later I got a call from a general manager asking me to “meet for coffee” (aka interview me informally so she can ditch me if I end up being lame). She was interested in having me apply for a visual position, but as someone who has been a merchandising manager for awhile now and does not particularly enjoy it I let her know that I’m really more passionate about team building and customer service. So she arranged for me to interview for a different position at a different store.
I wish I was less into myself, but if I’m being real I totally nailed the next interview. Like, nailed it to the wall. Like…I don’t how else to describe it without making it weird so I’ll move on. I had a phone interview a few days later with her district manager and a few minutes after that I had a job offer. I took it and put in my two weeks that day.
I was SO excited for a fresh start with a brand that I was already eternally obsessed with (duh) and was so ready to leave behind this role that was stealing so much of my free time and causing me so much stress. I was fully prepared to move on.
…until my current district manager offered my a higher position, with significantly higher pay at a location that was less than ten minutes from my house.
I spent two weeks going back and forth because on the one hand I had already accepted this new job and wanted to keep my word. I felt so riddled with guilt thinking about telling my future store manager that I wouldn’t be joining her team (not to mention the fact that I wouldn’t be able to shop there ever again out of shame).
But when I thought about what I wanted out of my retail career and what it meant to be offered this amazing position with a huge pay increase and at a location I had always wanted to work in, it seemed silly that I was even considering to turn it down.
So before my start date I respectfully declined Sephora’s offer and will now forever only be able to shop online because I can’t even begin to stomach how AWKWARD it would be for me to go up there. Needless to say their store manager wasn’t pleased (I mean she never responded to me, so maybe she was and just didn’t tell me, but doesn’t seem likely). I’m still feeling a little bit weird about it. Not regretful because I know in term of my career path and financially stability this was a much better choice. But in terms of sticking to my word, I feel bad. Maybe I shouldn’t feel bad, maybe I should feel worse. Either way, it’s my decision and I have to live with it.
The second big decision was to take a semester off of school.
To some of you this might sound totally insane and to others not crazy at all. But the fact is that it’s almost impossible to run a successful business and also maintain strong grades as a full time student. I’ve been doing both for years now and I finally had to make the decision to support my happiness and my mental health. It felt like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. My days off from work were already so rare, and when I was off I was in class all day barely able to even to keep my eyes open. I realized that this just wasn’t working for me anymore and looked into taking a semester off.
It’s easy to feel like a failure because I just want to graduate already. But at the same time, I want to graduate with good grades and without being so boggled down with stress that I’m constantly exhausted and miserable. So even though I feel kind of disappointed in myself, I’m also proud that I made a decision that will ultimately help me realign and feel more refreshed. Plus I can actually dedicate some real time to making an impact in my new role at work without the distraction of school.
Priorities are different for everyone, and for me work has always come before school. Maybe that’s because I’ve found a career I’m passionate about before I’ve even graduated or maybe it’s because I’m not a great student. Or both. Either way, I truly believe I can have it all. A degree, a job I love, a great blog. I just can’t have it all at once.
It takes time to accomplish great things and if a break and a job change is what I need to get back on track then that’s what I’m going to do. I’ll have more time to nurture my side passion-writing and documenting my beauty passion–and really give it the attention I think it deserves.
And for the first time in awhile, I’m feeling really genuinely happy with my life. I’m on my way to making my dreams come true and I did it all myself. Seeing my hard work manifest into tangible accomplishments is an amazing feeling.
Expect to hear from me soon, I have time now! 🙂
Xoxo,
She
